Sylvester McMonkey McBean’s Guide to Marketing Success - Virtual Assistant Israel

Sylvester McMonkey McBean’s Guide to Marketing Success

Be a marketing... star.

Sylvester McMonkey McBean marketing success sneetches

You would expect to see a car-driving, contraption-building monkey in the middle ring of a 3-ring circus. But Sylvester McMonkey McBean should be speaking at Content Marketing World or New Media Expo.

While a Sneetch and his money may be easily parted, this monkey shows more marketing skill than most in laying his hands on the combined wealth of the entire Sneetch beach.

Let’s see how easily we can get McBean to part with some of his marketing success tips:

Solve a problem.

It’s really hard to convince someone that his life is incomplete without your product or service. Creating a need where none exists, if possible, requires lots of time and budget to spend on advertising.

But if that same someone feels his life is incomplete, and you can show him how your product or service will fill the gaping hole – well, who needs convincing? Filling an existing need is infinitely easier.

The Plain-Belly Sneetches were convinced they had a serious problem.

Then one day, it seems… while the Plain-Belly Sneetches
Were moping and doping alone on the beaches,
Just sitting there wishing their bellies had stars…
A stranger zipped up in the strangest of cars.

Not only did they feel their lives were incomplete – they were suffering a deep societal depression. Talk about a problem crying out for a fix.

Get people to notice you.

…A stranger zipped up in the strangest of cars.
“My friends,” he announced in a voice clear and keen,
“My name is Sylvester McMonkey McBean.”

Even if you have the perfect answer to the world’s problems, if you can’t get their attention, they’re never going to know.

Richard Branson, CEO of Virgin, is the master of marketing stunts that draw attention, from driving a tank down 5th Avenue to launching Virgin Cola, to bungee jumping off the roof of a hotel casino in Las Vegas. While McBean’s red shoe-shaped car doesn’t have quite the presence of a tank, it certainly made the Sneetches snap out of their funk and take notice.

Shape what people think about you.

This personal branding insight is a jewel, and has stuck in my mind since I read it in Derek Halpern’s ebook, How to Get Your First 5K Subscribers. Prior to launching SocialTriggers, Derek did conversion-related videos for most major marketing blogs, asking each host to introduce him like this:

“Derek Halpern shows people how to turn traffic into leads and sales. And if you’re not getting traffic, he shows you how to get that too. How? Psychology + Marketing.”

Derek writes:

If you’ve ever heard about what I do at Social Triggers, chances are you probably thought ‘psychology and marketing guy.’

You thinking that wasn’t an accident. I shaped it.

In order for you to attract potential subscribers and solution-seekers, you have to shape what people think about you. And it has to be very, very specific.

McBean knows this. Knows it well.

How does he introduce himself to the Sneetches?

“I’ve heard of your troubles. I’ve heard you’re unhappy.
But I can fix that. I’m the Fix-It-Up Chappie.”


Catchy. Specific. Resonates with his moping audience. And I bet there aren’t many Fix-It-Up Chappies driving around on them beaches.

Use the words your target audience uses to describe their problem.

Why should your product engineering team NEVER, EVER, EVER be the ones to write your marketing copy? Because their minds are filled with the jargon (excuse me, the “correct terminology”) of the industry.

The only problem is, that’s not what the customers call it.

That’s not what they type in when they search on Google.

That’s not what they’re yearning to see when they hit your landing page.

Dov Gordon of the Alchemist Entrepreneur has a powerful exercise for writing on-target copy. Imagine your ideal customer is sitting with her best friend in a coffee shop. She’s talking to her about a big problem she has (the problem your product or solution is perfect to solve). What is she saying? How is she describing the problem?

Use those words in your copy.

McBean knows this linguistic marketing secret. When he turns to the original Star-Belly Sneetches, who are infuriated at the new star-bearing imposters, he says:

So you don’t know who’s who. That is perfectly true.
But come with me, friends. Do you know what I’ll do?
I’ll make you again the best Sneetches on beaches
And all it will cost you is ten dollars eaches.

Note his choice of words: “best Sneetches on beaches.” Why did he pick that and not “most elegant Sneetches” or “elite Sneetches” or “in-crowd Sneetches”?

Because those are the words the Sneetches used to describe their plight upon seeing the new Star-Bellies:

“Good grief,” groaned the ones who had stars at the first.
“We’re still the best Sneetches and they are the worst.”

And this is, in fact, indicative of their mentality from day one.

But because they had stars, all the Star-Belly Sneetches
Would brag “We’re the best kind of Sneetch on the beaches.

The most important thing to the Star-Belly Sneetches? To be “the best Sneetches.” McBean plays right to that.

Guarantee results.

“My prices are low. And I work at great speed.
And my work is 100% guaranteed!”

We humans (and I guess Sneetches as well) are risk-averse. The idea of investing and losing is scary. The more sizable an investment, the more hesitant we are.

Guarantees remove the risk barrier. Your money back if you’re not fully satisfied, free return shipping, try risk-free for a month before being charged… all bring your audience closer to saying, “I’ll try it!”

McBean guaranteed his Star-On and Star-Off Machines… and he backed his claim. The only issue was that he didn’t guarantee the Sneetches would be happy…

Luckily the Sneetches figured that out for themselves.

aviva-lgSubmitted by Aviva